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On Conditional vs Unconditional Okayness

I want to feel good.

I bet you do to. It’s natural to want to feel good.

But I don’t always get to feel good. Neither do you. And it’s practically guaranteed that you and I will feel bad at some point in the future, even if we’re feeling great now.

If we are staking our okayness on feeling good, we are dooming ourselves to frequent bouts of non-okayness.

Okayness is more important than feeling good.

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Deep down inside, we all know that feeling bad will not last forever. (Deep down inside, we all know that feelingĀ good will not last forever, either.) In other words, we know that “this too shall pass”.

But we can live with that.

What we cannot live with is non-okayness. If we have a sense that life is not okay, I am not okay, nothing is okay…and it never will be okay…

…we cannot bear to live like that.

So here’s my long-winded point: many of us frequently mistakenly believe that okayness and feeling good are the same.

They are not.

Okayness is what is always the case.

It isn’t about feeling good. It isn’t about things going my way. It isn’t about my life lasting forever. It isn’t about people liking me. It isn’t about the survival of the species.

You can recognize it in an instant. Right now, let go of the tension in your forehead.

Quickly, before you jump to the next thought, just note that in this one instant, it is clear that okayness is all that is happening.

Only in the next second when we grasp at the next thought can we believe that okayness depends upon anything. In this one moment it is clear that okayness is unconditional.

I will die. You will die. We will experience pain, doubt, fear, and loss.

Okayness is unconditional.


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